That's right. I think I did from the last heartbreak. And now, I am little by little becoming successful at averting another emotional debacle from happening. I am maybe shallow, gullible, and cheesy but I know that I am putting to good use the more important lessons I have learned not too long ago: never jump until 100% sure that someone or at least something will take the fall - a safety net perhaps and with that I mean literally.
Anyhow, part of my resolve to minimize the effects of infatuation is to keep as far away as possible from the object of my affection. And I think it is working. The pull is not as strong compared to the time when I first felt it but its still there. I managed to tell myself that controlling my emotions will take time and practice and constant practice would probably mean in this case, doing it everyday - working day that is. Somehow, pushing myself away is the best remedy to alleviate the fear of hurting again because in my case, giving in to what I like is the root cause of all of my heart's suffering.
I hope I succeed. A stable life may be boring but going through heartbreak after heartbreak should not be my idea of fun. I have this feeling that its suicide committed over a long period of time. For now, I'd really want to be safe than sorry again.
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